I decided I’m keeping the baby. After a week of agonizing stress and fighting with my boyfriend and my conscience I broke down to my mom and told her. Thankfully, she wasn’t mad at all and she gave me some good advice. She told me that getting an abortion is a choice that I would regret for the rest of my life, but that keeping it is a choice I never would. I knew that what she said is the truth. I only ever considered abortion because my boyfriend was so adamant about it. The reason for that being that the child has a 50% of having the same debilitating genetic disorder that he has(myotonic dystrophy) and he already has another child on way with his ex-girlfriend. Since I found out, I have made the necessary decision to quit drugs. I got a couple subs and I’m going to do the right thing. This is God’s plan for me and I have to step up and embrace it.
This has got to be one of the worst days of my life. I found out I’m pregnant today, and I’m pretty certain my boyfriend wants me to get an abortion. I’m an wreck and I can’t get a fucking break for anything. Now we’re fighting at 3am over dumb ass shit and I just want to go to bed. God help me.
Got cut off by the coke man last night. God damn it. Probably for the best. Just got new rigs too…such a shame.
For me it is. That’s sad though isn’t it? But damn, 1 drug is an improvement from 2…it’s a step in the right direction, no?
Awwww shitttt look who’s got a boyfriend and is now getting laid on the regular LOL. Falling in love feels better than any drug :)
I decided to get clean, again. 6 days clean from pills. The cocaine is the only thing holding me back. I’ve shot coke or smoked crack every single day…and it’s probably the only thing keeping me from doing the pills. It’s an improvement though, right? A friend of mine traded me an entire suboxone strip for a used rig and it was a fucking lifesaver. Then the same friend gave me another half sub for a hit of crack, lol. I started a new relationship, and my best friend got locked up. Those were the 2 main factors for kicking it. My new boyfriend(who’s fucking awesome) is getting clean with me and it’s so much easier to have someone right there going through the same shit. So I say goodbye to it all, once again, for now. I’ll be back, but it might be a while before I visit the dark side again.